Anger Management

“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. – Ephesians 4:26

We understand the strong grip that anger can have on a person. Anger is a powerful emotion, one that is hard to control — especially when dealing with deep-rooted problems that cause anger issues in the first place.

Not all anger is wrong – the Bible says, “in your anger do not sin.” This implies that on some occasions, it’s possible to be angry without sinning. Jesus Himself displayed righteous anger in the temple (Matthew 21:12, Mark 11:15-16) – and he was without sin. But how do we do it?

Though gaining control of your anger might feel impossible, Christian anger management counseling can help you to pause, work through strong emotions, react in ways that are healthy, and eventually let it go.

One out of five Americans has an anger management problem.

What Causes People to Get Angry?

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? – James 4:1

If you struggle with anger, you might have some idea of the things that cause you to be angry — at least on the surface. Often, people with anger management problems feel their anger is reasonable or at least justified to a degree. Even if they know the reaction is too strong, they might blame outside sources for causing the anger in the first place. What many don’t realize is that the source of anger is usually found within a person’s heart, for “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45b). It’s easy to blame external circumstances for our response, but the circumstances often reveal what is already inside, waiting to be unleashed.

Causes of anger management issues include:

• Unmet desires – On most occasions (for people of all ages – children, teens, and adults), anger is the result of a person not getting what he or she wants. Anger management counseling from a Christian perspective will help you learn how to identify and manage your desires and disappointments in a peaceful, Biblical way.
• Hidden pain – Uncontrolled anger is often caused by deep, hidden emotions and pain. For some people, anger results from feelings of fear, rejection, sadness, loneliness, or abandonment. Some people use anger as a shield to hide feelings they are afraid to experience or show others.
• Difficulty expressing emotion – When a person reacts with anger, other emotions often simmer just beneath the surface. Some people struggle to express sadness, viewing it as weakness. This can start at a young age if expressing negative emotions led to undesired results. In such cases, serious anger issues may arise later in life.
• Learned behavior – Many times, people with anger issues had caretakers who also had a problem with anger. When this happens, you might learn to deal with anger by screaming, name calling, or acting violently. Habits formed in childhood can be hard to break without professional help.
• Confusing assertiveness with anger – People with anger issues often have a difficult time expressing their needs and concerns. Some feel that reacting in anger is the best way to get the results they want, but usually angry outbursts have the opposite effect. Anger management counseling can teach you how to assert yourself in a healthy and productive way.
• Mental health disorders – Uncontrolled anger might be a symptom of certain mental health concerns like depression, addiction, anxiety, or bipolar disorder. If you have any of these problems, it can be very difficult to express anger constructively.

If you or someone you love struggles with anger management issues, it’s important to get help right away. Anger issues are dangerous for everyone involved and are often a sign of other problems that need to be dealt with.

When is Anger a Problem?

Uncontrolled anger can lead to serious consequences. Anger issues can have lasting, damaging effects on a person’s health, relationships, and connection with God. Studies have shown that people who are prone to lashing out in frequent bouts of anger are more susceptible to heart attacks, clogged arteries, stroke, and high cholesterol.

Anger is a problem when it:

• Falls into the “sin” category (as opposed to righteous anger).
• Hurts or offends other people.
• Leads to bad behavior choices such as fits of yelling and verbal abuse.
• Becomes a habit and shows up more often than not.
• Damages relationships and goes unresolved.
• Contributes to aggression, violence, or self-harm.
• Causes a person to fall into social or legal problems.
• Alienates the angered person from others.
• Is used as a means of control or as a way of masking deeper issues.

Symptoms of anger management issues include:

• Quickly and frequently angered with a tendency to yell or argue.
• Persistent feelings of frustration toward yourself and others.
• Difficulty enjoying life or the company of others. Physical signs include headaches, rapid breathing, nausea, and pounding heart.

It can be hard to admit that you or someone you love has anger issues. At Spokane Christian Counseling, we admire those who seek help, and we are dedicated to helping individuals, couples, and families overcome struggles that stem from issues with anger.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.– James 1:19-20

In Exodus 34, the Lord passes by Moses, proclaiming His own name: “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness …” (Exodus 34:6). Isn’t it so interesting that one of primary ways God identifies Himself is that He is slow to anger?

As Christians, one of our main desires should be to become more like our Lord. If one of God’s most prominent qualities is that He is slow to anger, shouldn’t we make every effort to emulate His character?

What does anger management mean? In a nutshell, the goal of Christian anger management counseling is to help you understand why you have a problem with anger and how to manage and express strong emotions. Learning how to use your anger appropriately is very liberating and can lead to huge improvements in the quality of your life and relationships.

20% of people report ending a relationship because of the way a person acts when angry.

What Happens in Anger Management Counseling?

Christian anger management counseling will help you connect with God so you can learn how to express your emotions in a healthy way while learning Bible-based principles for what it means to live a Christ-filled, temperate life.

At Spokane Christian Counseling, we know how hard it can be to work through anger issues. That’s why we offer a compassionate, safe place for you to find healing and growth.

Does Anger Counseling Work?

At Spokane Christian Counseling, we have the privilege of helping people overcome all kinds of issues. With years of experience and sound counseling methods, we are confident that our Christian anger management counselors can help you get the results you want. Our faith-based approach to wellness includes proven evidence-based anger management techniques and treatments along with tools that support and encourage your Christian beliefs, such as prayer, Bible study, and faith in Christ for healing and redemption.

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.– James 1:19-20

We all get angry at times. Sometimes anger is healthy and can be used to stand up for your rights or the rights of others. But when anger is directed in a negative way that harms yourself or others, it might be time for professional help. Ultimately, according to Scripture, “human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires” – so let’s see how we can partner together to pursue righteousness with God’s help.

Nearly two-thirds of U.S. adolescents have experienced an anger attack that involved threatening violence, destroying property, or engaging in violence toward others.

Christian Anger Management Counseling for Adults

Sometimes asking for help is the hardest part of anger management recovery. Our Christian counselors will do everything possible to help you feel supported while you work through tough issues.

Through Christian counseling, you can:

• Gain a better understanding of what triggers your anger.
• Learn how to calm yourself when angry.
• Discover ways of expressing anger in a healthy, constructive manner.
• Find accountability for your anger and the effects it has on your yourself and others.
• Heal from past wounds that your anger might be masking.
• Learn to acknowledge your anger and other emotions before they escalate. Find forgiveness of self and others while building a relationship with Christ.

Imagine a life that is free from uncontrolled anger. We can help you find that peace and control, so you can work to rebuild relationships and continue to grow into all you are created to be. If anger is destroying your relationships, Christian marriage and couples counseling can help you work through these issues together.

Christian Anger Management Counseling for Children and Teens

If your child or teen has a problem with anger, we understand how stressful that can be. There are many causes for anger issues in children and teens, and sometimes it can be hard for parents to pinpoint from where the behavior and emotional problems stem. Christian counseling offers the insight and tools your child needs to live a healthy, Christ-filled life.

Our Christian counselors can help your child:

• Discover hidden causes of anger and find healing for those issues.
• Learn how to express all of their emotions, such as sadness, guilt, and frustration.
• Gain tools for calming intense emotions in a healthy manner.
• Work with other family members to create a safe, nurturing environment.
• Find unconditional love and peace through forming a relationship with Christ.

Learning to manage anger at a young age is very important for future social, academic, personal, and spiritual development. If your young one has a hard time with anger, it’s important to get help right away so they have a greater chance at building a healthy, fulfilling life. Click here to learn more about Christian counseling for children and teens.

Spokane Christian Counseling is dedicated to helping people build lives that are happy, healthy, and made whole through Christ. If you, your child, or your spouse needs help with anger management, our skilled Christian counselors have tools for lasting, positive change.

Are you ready to control your anger? Contact us today to schedule your risk-free initial session.

To learn more about Christian anger management counseling or to schedule an appointment, contact us online  or give us a call at 509-209-8961.